FOOL THAT I AM

for michael williams, jr.

the sun is leaving earlier
i noticed today that it's
a trick on my eyes because
everybody's still moving around
as if the sky was lit

maybe early evening
when all my chores are done
& there's just enough time
to see a movie on cable
& maybe call a few people

the sun leaving earlier
evokes a response
that sometimes comes in
small gestures

light brushes of my eyes
against the pure air of movement
merely blinks
acknowledgements of the present
where
there are conversations i want to have
that i can't have with others
& because he doesn't know me
he might be the one to coax the talk
out of me

the number came from someone
who told someone else & they told me
so i used it because at church i'm just
there & even afterwards, daddy
just takes me to my grandmother's
where i can go outside, but inside,
there are still these conversations
i want to have

like how the sun is leaving earlier
& when i finally talked to him
i decided that i could talk to him
& wanted to talk to him
early enough in the evening
that my father would think i
had been in the house...

i hope he likes me...

we've talked so much
i feel like i know him...

i wonder what he looks like...

it's late...

...i have to go home!

H.
9-8-2005